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Along with Teddy boys and beat poets, vegetarians were invented in the 1950s, with the original aim of eating all of the world’s plant life by the end of the century. Early radicals were responsible for consuming most of Savernake Forest, but a less intense form of the practice became more prevalent during the 1970s. Currently, most vegetarians adhere to the principle of not eating any animal flesh, although some do make an exception for sustainably sourced fish such as tom pot blenny, North Sea whiff and cucumber.
A typical vegetarian meal consists of a nut cutlet, with nut and onion gravy and tempura battered nuts, followed by a nut-baba with nut and nettle sorbet. This can be eaten at least 48 times a day without exceeding the recommended adult intake of 2,400 calories.
The more extreme vegetarians are known as vegans (not to be confused with fans of Suzanne Vega, who are known as Vegans) and as well as eschewing meat, they also refuse to use any item made from any part of an animal, such as goatskin spats, giraffe tail draught excluders and the Fiat Uno.
Less than 4% of pensioners are vegetarian, though another 22% are by default, as they cannot afford meat.