Dust, Sleepy


Sleepy dust is one of the colloquial terms for the dried mucus that forms in the corner of the eyes during sleep and this affects pensioners to such an extent that more than one in three are unable to open their eyes in the morning without first applying Mr Muscle Gunk & Awe or a similar product.

In folklore, sleepy dust was thought to have a number of nefarious properties, including causing nightmares involving snails, encouraging moths to hibernate in the ears and making new born babies susceptible to rebellious legs and mephitic eructations.

In reality, sleepy dust is evidence of correctly functioning ocular membranes and if carefully removed at regular intervals, can also be used to clean copper utensils, make accurate moulds of small invertebrates and add an intriguing texture and flavour to posset, panna cotta and other fungal puddings.