By the time you reach pension age, you should have accumulated enough tools to be reasonably well equipped for any task inside or outside of the home.

Tools are usually kept in rugged metal boxes which are virtually impossible to open and can be conveniently stored under the stairs along with the suitcases, Christmas decorations, air rifle and carpet offcuts. A shoe box is often reserved for those tools which are rarely used or whose exact purpose has been lost in the mists of time – such as tappet gauges, hole saws, dibbers, novelty nut crackers and hoover attachments.

Discussing tools in public can lead to confusion, as many people will think you’re referring to Michael Gove or members of the National Front.