Sherry is a fortified wine most commonly drunk by public school geography masters, senior midwives and church wardens, but occasionally used by pensioners as an ingredient in trifles.

Although Spanish in origin, most sherry is now produced in Bristol, where it is also used to caulk deck timbers in luxury yachts, and South Africa, where it is often poured into vuvuzelas as a liquid mute.

Dry sherry is an excellent accompaniment to dumplings and nesselrode, while sweet sherry complements drisheen and pandowdy extremely well.  Sherry Blair is usually accompanied by delusions of infallibility and an irrational compulsion to drop bombs on people you’ve never met.