Despite having 45 years’ experience of the task, most pensioners still find shaving problematic, and this is usually compounded by the embarrassment of appearing in public with half a toilet roll stuck to various parts of the face.

In fact, the majority of pensioners, particularly women, shave far too often, and it has been scientifically proven that removing facial hair more often then once every 17 days can cause dizziness, nausea, insomnia and random grouting.

Furthermore, electric shavers produce residual static charges which can affect hearing, smell and taste, and there is some evidence that vibrating cutter heads can resonate at a frequency which will eventually make your teeth fall out. (If you wear false teeth, this will happen much more quickly).

Cut-throat razors are by far the best option for both men and women, though pensioners with SDT (Slight Digital Tremors) should only use them under supervision.

Aftershave should be used with care, as most are based on astringent paint strippers.