Media, Social


Social media is the inherently misleading term for various means of communication that largely eliminate the need to meet other people in the flesh and talk to them face to face.

In general, pensioners have been relatively slow to embrace social media, mainly because they have little enthusiasm for emptying large buckets of mindless vitriol over people they’ve never met, have chronic joint problems that prevent them taking countless selfies and have an outdated notion of privacy that discourages them from relating every minute detail of their lives to thousands of complete strangers.

That said, an increasing number of social media platforms are now being developed to address such issues, including

Facebok.  Similar to Facebook but exclusively concerned with photos and messages related to antelopes.

Witter.  Similar to Twitter but deliberately more obtuse and rambling.

EweTube.  Similar to YouTube but confined to pensioners who take sheep on the underground.

Instagrim.  Similar to Instagram but only sharing pictures of people looking miserable.

Napchat.  Similar to Snapchat but with regular breaks for afternoon snoozing.

Tumbler and Flicker.  Similar to Tumblr and Flickr but not spelt in a stupid way.