Bands, Elastic

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Many pensioners acquire unfeasibly large collections of elastic bands, which usually occupy several drawers of kitchen cabinets along with skewers, trivets, straws, clothes pegs, toothpicks and strangely shaped pastry cutters.

As yet, no-one has been able to satisfactorily explain this phenomenon, although studies at Sussex University seem to suggest that elastic bands may represent a metaphorical allusion to the lack of flexibility which naturally occurs in the aging process.  Other studies, mostly in German institutions, have concluded that they’re very good for preventing sausages rolling out of the fridge.

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